I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
Впервые за шесть с половиной лет о любимом мужчине.

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Пожалуй, самое важное в личности Ючона, на мой взгляд, это некая двойственность, многогранность. Я не особо верю в астрологию, но Ючон - Близнецы и этот знак ему очень идет. В нем сочетаются мужественность и чувственность, меланхоличность и озорство. Он - консерватор и либерал, последний романтик и плейбой. В общем, писать о нем нелегко и еще сложнее связать мысли в более-менее логичный порядок. И все же я попытаюсь.

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@темы: Yoochunnie

15:33

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
After all that's happened 2 weeks ago... I thought I would recover normally but it's not happening. It not only made me not want to translate anything or share anything at all. It effectively dulled my interest in the band (I haven't listened to a single song in these 3 weeks), completely killed the inspiration for all the stories I have been writing, marred the completion of the video I've been working on for a year and lessened my faith in humanity. My life is full of shit as it is. I have health problems, money problems, family problems and relationship problems. The only thing that made me happy was fandom. I can't afford to be in a fandom that does this to me.

I really hope I can find it in me to find the love for this amazing band again and finish my precious stories. But one thing is clear: nothing will ever be the same for me.

Should I change the tag 'fandom' to 'fandom sucks'?

@темы: fandom

19:07 

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00:03

Ryouhei

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
Lately I really got interested in this adorable man. I knew about him long ago since he's a friend of Shou and they even played together long ago but I never really tried to check him up properly.

It's a lot like with Masato - I adore the guitarist but don't like the vocalist at all. And not really into the music, neither Ayabie nor Megamasso. But, you know, I can't help it.

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Ryouhei is one of the few J-rockers who actually likes wearing dresses and he's been doing that for all of his career. It looks good on him and he knows it. I watched Junko's Room where Jun obsesses over him in the creepiest way possible but he's really cool. I also found out that this guy is apparently the main composer and the leader too. Way to go, girl! I men , man. Duh.



I wish Ryouhei would host a show and invite guests for tea and self-made cookies. Shou would have to visit him and they could share fashion tips over cake and tea. Ok, I beter stop before I get carried off to the land of the unicorns~

@темы: J-Rock

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
Depeche Mode has long since been one of my favourite bands ever. Well, I have no interest in it now, but that doesn't change the fact.

But you know, for most people DM has always been about Dave and it's so unfair. I never really liked Dave Gahan. I mean he has a great voice but as an artist he is just an entertainer, not even much of a musician. He's very overrated and really full of shit. DM is Martin's band, no doubt about that. I think white music scene is way too fixated on vocalists. Like, in US you can never have a band like Malice Mizer who changed 3 vocalists and remained the same awesome band it was.

But anyway. The reason I wrote this is this: I knew Martin wrote all the lyrics which are all fucking brilliant and he's my favourite English-speaking lyricist of all time. But I just found out he actually composed all the music too. Actually all music from 1984 to 2005, and most of the rest. It makes me angry that his wikipeadia page is tiny. Martin, you are so awesome. I feel you.

13:31

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
Ain't it funny? Tonight of all nights I had my first proper ToraxShou dream. It was lovely.

I was backstage for what I think was a Halloween concert. I remember Tora had this white and black powder for make-up and I thought it would really suit him. Then at one point all the members were sitting in line on some long sofa or something. Shou was on the far left and Tora was next to him. I was watching them intently trying to catch a sign of something special. You know. They were discussing something quietly, pretty much whispering to each other. And then all of a sudden Shou leaned forward and kissed Tora. It wasn't passionate, but rather warm and comfortable. I was amazed they didn't mind me. The kiss didn't last long, it was kind of very natural and affectionate.

I guess my subconscious is trying to coax me into finishing the story. Apart from that I also remember Shou on stage dressed in a very Hydeish way. It wasn't exactly a dress, but the kind of long white gown Hyde used to wear in early 90's and a headband. Something like that. I guess it's connected to my Halloween expectations. I see what you're trying to do, brain.

@темы: Dreams, ToraxShou

01:57

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
I'm kinda like a ronin... a fan without a fandom. It's kinda lonely but also a little liberating.

@темы: musings, fandom

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
- Bolero
- All In Vain
- You're My Song

I came up with these in about 5 seconds. If I had to do top 10 that'd be a lot harder. This rating doesn't include solo songs or covers, of course.

@темы: list, TVXQ

02:32

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
I hate fandoms. I hate being a fan. I'm sick of this shit. How do I retire?

@темы: fandom

04:01

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
Sometime I think I suffer because of my inflated ego. But then sometimes I begin to think that maybe it's the only thing that keeps me afloat. Or maybe it's both.

@темы: musings, one-liner

03:57

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
For the first time in 2 years I missed an Alice9 Channel. I never missed it even if it was at 7 am. And today I missed it not because I was busy or I forgot even though I didn’t look forward to it. I missed it because I didn't care. It used to be the only constant source of joy in my pathetic life and now it's gone, just like that. And here I thought my life couldn't get any emptier.

@темы: musings, A9 Channel

16:04

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
I actually went out on Sunday. For the first time in months. The same two girls I hung out with after the graduation but this time we had a full course, I was out for about 6 hours which is a record long. And it was alright, you know. It was ok. But I can't even call it good. Well, we only met because N. is leaving for Japan and she treated us. I wonder if we ever see each other again.

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I am so fucking depressing.

01:45

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
Мне начинает казаться, что я никогда не закончу пост о Ючоне. Каждый раз, когда пытаюсь его свернуть, приходят все новые мысли и я бросаюсь их записывать.

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
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To be honest I was somewhat disappointed the interview was just about 6 minutes long including the clips and the questions were very standard. But it was nice to see two of my favourite men together. I have to say Shou was even more awkward than I imagined. He looks like a schoolboy.

But you know, it's actually pretty interesting. When I look at the two of them I think about how it's unfair that there's Hyde never really wanted to be a vocalist and he didn't do anything to work on his voice and he didn't even enjoy singing until a few years ago and then there's Shou who went out of his way to become a better vocalist and practiced and took care of his health but in the end he will never be half as good as Hyde.

But oh, you two are adorable, sirs.

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@темы: Shou, Hyde, match

01:02 

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I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...

Oh, honey. You are superb!

@темы: ViViD, L'Arc~en~Ciel, video, match

15:13

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
October 3. It just fucking snowed. I quit this planet.

15:06

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
In other news the courses have begun but I'm not there. I did sign the application but I still had a lot of doubts. So after long debates with myself I decided not to go through with it. I really didn't want to lose the sense of community and I'll miss my group and the lovely garden but in the end I hate the book since it's so different from what I want to learn and it's really cold outside even now so it seemed more like a burden. All that enthusiasm I had in the first year is now gone. I might try to re-apply next year to catch up with my folks. For now it's gonna be a year of self-study.

@темы: 勉強

12:19

I don’t wanna feel Blue anymore...
Bim-Bom, здавствуйте!

Вас ко мне привели ДБСК? Но ведь я сейчас очень редко при них пишу... :shy2:

@темы: welcome

01:46 

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